Dude Where's My Car!?!?

Allow me to tell you about my day yesterday....

It started off as any other. I woke up at 6am, crammed in some writing in bed with my morning coffee.. reluctantly got out of bed, picked my work outfit for the day and got ready.

I decided that I would take my car to the car wash (it was in dire need of a good scrub and vacuum!). 

It was a freezing cold wintery morning as I dropped off the car, paid for the service in advance and walked down the road to the art gallery where I work. I'd told them that I'd be back at 5pm (after work) to pick up the car. 

The day ensued - and after 5pm I bundled up and walked briskly back to the garage. Usually, I see my car parked outside in the parking lot, shiny and good as new. This time... I didn't. 

I knew something was wrong before I even got to the counter and asked for the keys. I had a gut feeling. 

Sure enough, my keys were not on their rack. 

"What car do you have, ma'am?" The manager (I presume,) asks me, scurrying over as he sees the problem arise. 

"A blue micra," I inform him.

"Oh! The blue Micra with roof-racks? That was collected earlier!" he tells me. 

"What!? By WHO!?" I panic, demanding to know who collected my car.

I am lead into the back to look at the security cameras. Sure enough, there is a man (re)paying for the car wash and collecting my keys before driving out of the garage with MY car. 

Call dad. 

"It sounds like your cars been stolen!" Dad states the obvious, abandoning his beer and hastily joining me at the garage.

Someone has got to be playing a joke on me! I think, not knowing whether to laugh or cry.

All I know at this point is that my precious Blue Crush (the name I dubbed my little blue surf mobile,) is gone. 

The garage puts a cafe latte in my hands - their attempts to keep me calm as I wait for them to explain what is going on. They have started dialing numbers, trying to discover WHO this man is and WHY he has my car.

My car is gone! 

Drunken hobo's causing havoc and screaming 'Foetsek!' (Afrikaans for 'Fuck Off',) are only making things worse.

 Head is spinning. 

Ah!!

Car located!

Manager of garage establishes who this man who has my car is.

But why does he have my car?! 

WELL.....

Europcar (a car rental business,) is situated right alongside garage. Turns out that this man was picking up a car for a friend - but didn't know which car it was. Someone handed over my keys. Man drove off, blissfully unaware. 

Now, said man, is not picking up his phone. 

I am standing around for nearly an hour trying to figure out where the hell my car is!! Arranged through a car rental business my car could be halfway to Cape Town already!!!!!! (which, for your overseas readers, is a city a good five hours away from my town!). 

Where is my car?! 

How could it have been mistaken for a rental car anyway!? There's dream-catchers, rosary, a bikini crammed into the passengers crevice in the door.. Plus the odd shoe strewn across the floor.. Not to mention my music.. 

What rental car has freaking Rolling Stones 'Cocaine Eyes' blasting from the speakers?! 

Finally reach 'Culprit Who Has Jade's Car's' wife... 

He is on his way back with the vehicle - luckily still in town. 

More waiting. Is he having dinner first!? 

Finally Blue Micra revs up and man exits car. 

He's friendly looking. 

"Are you the owner?!" He asks. 

"Yes!" I laugh back. 

He hands me the keys, apologizing. 

Manager tries to give him the keys to the CORRECT vehicle that he was supposed to collect. 

"Not a fuck!" Man refuses.. Clearly pissed off at the garage and car rental business now as stalks down the road, carless. 

Offer man a lift to get to where he needs to go. 

He says thanks but no thanks. He's too cross... Time to walk it off.

Seriously. I think garages need to implement a sign in and out sheet or something?!? This could have ended a lot worse than it had. 

Car safely now back - with rightful owner. AKA: Me.

What a day.

Only in Africa.