Unemployment

Sitting here in my room, hovering my fingers over the keyboard. Its a wet and dreary day, it should also be the second day of my new job at Easy Holidays. Alas, I decided against telemarketing. After accepting the job offer, I realized that there would be no basic salary. It was all commission based. It just seemed like too big a risk for me to take.

So I raise my mug filled to the brim with creamy, sweet coffee to all of you that, like me, are unemployed.

At first it was great to be able to spend my days lazing around my house, writing furiously into my computer, as I've been able to start a new novel. Now though, the money in my bank account is running out. I have about R500 to my name to last me through until I eventually find a job, then I still have to survive another month of working before getting my first pay check!

Its not like I haven't been searching for a job. I have had two job offers. One offer I was quite excited about. I got offered a job to be a Personal Trainer (one step up from Curves...) but just like Easy Holidays, its all based around commission. I need a monthly salary. Especially now that Funie and I are practically living together. I haven't slept at home in a month.

I adore sleeping over at Funie's house. Every morning he wakes me up in the most amazing way. He cuddles me close and kisses my neck, whispering 'good morning my angel' to me. Then every morning he adds something different after that. My two favorite one's were: 'Your the most beautiful girl in the world. If I had to choose anyone to be here with right now, it would be you...' and 'You make everything worth it.'

We've shared even more amazing memories since I last wrote. His brother Jaco, lent us his S.U.P this past Sunday, its a surf board that's about triple the size of me! We paddled out, me lying in front and him at the back. We caught some amazing waves, we rode down the face of the waves and stayed up for ages! It was so much fun and we had some funny wipe outs too.

We rode one waves for so long that when I finally lost balance and toppled over from excitement, we'd gone right over the reef and I got my first surfing injury. I kicked the reef with my feet, tore all the skin off my toes and sliced the top of my foot.

Was wondering when I was going to get my first surf injury!

Funie and I have also just celebrated our one month anniversary together! Time flies!

Back to the reason I am writing...

I also feel extra pressure now as my grandmother from the UK is down for a visit. I hate feeling like a failure. I want to show her that I am doing well for myself, but instead I'm an unemployed, beach bum to her. I feel like she is constantly judging me. My cousin, Jessica King, is her favorite grandchild and she makes it blatantly obvious. All she talks about is Jess. I tell myself each and every time that she comes down to visit that she will see I'm doing well for myself. I want her to be proud of me... Yet each and every time she comes down I muck something up and all she see's is a failure.

Last night Funie and I went out for dinner at Bosun's. I flicked through a copy of the Actions Ads and my heart literally did a double flip when I saw Wordsworth Books was advertising a vacancy for a full-time sales assistant.

I love literature. A book store sales assistant would be the perfect job for me. I went in and handed in my CV, I have a job interview at 2pm this afternoon. They gave me a wad of forms to fill in, in the meantime. Wow! They ask some pretty intense questions! Such as if I'm a refugee, if I have ever been convicted of a criminal offense and if I am willing to go on a lie detector!?!?!

2011 hasn't been a better year than the last just yet. A tragedy happened. My friends father, Dave Howarth, passed away on the 2nd of Feb. He was also my parents best friend and like a second father to me. He has been suffering from lung cancer, so everyone knew that it was coming. Unfortunately, I don't think anyone could prepare themselves for something like that. I am so proud of his daughter, Rachel, though. She has been so strong and amazing. I wouldn't be able to be so strong. At the funeral they played a recorded version of Dave singing 'Blackbird.' It tingled a couple of heart strings. Not wanting to cry in front of the family, I bolted outside and the tears gushed out. I couldn't stay there. As I walked back to my car, running away from the pain and heartbreak, a noticed a rainbow hanging perfectly over the building. It was a magical moment.

All we can hope for is 2011 improving. 2010 was bad enough, we need a break now. 2011 needs to be a better year.

Please.

... Wish me luck for my job interview!