November Fireworks... (yes, I had no other name ok...)

I really do need to get into the habit of doing this more often; blogging, I mean. Whenever I finish a blog entry, I get such a major feeling of satisfaction. Seeing my words become tangible; to me that must be the best feeling in this world.

With thirty five working days left in 2011, I can tell you that since my last post, I have been a part of Jam Factory for a little over two months now and I really do love it. It is such an amazingly creative industry and the people that I work with are people that I can actually relate to and form real relationships with.

Shaun Barnard and I are going into our eighth month as a couple now and we have started to grow closer as each day goes by. We have had our hard times, our happy times and our differences. We have fought and very nearly ended things, but we didn’t. We worked through it and together nothing can bring us down. That sounds so cliché, but it is completely true. We work well together and make a great couple. Shaun Barnard is my soul mate, the one in this world that I see myself spending forever with. For as long as my heart beats and blood is surging through my veins I will live for that man, for he is everything I have ever wanted. He is loyal and he is kind. He looks at me in a way that gives me Goosebumps, as though he is looking right into my soul. He is always there whenever I need him and when he holds me in his arms it is as though he has formed a safety barrier around me. I feel like no one can hurt me when he cradles me and lets me rest on his gorgeous chest.

From the second I laid eyes on him, I knew he was someone that would be a part of my life. I had no idea it would get this deep though, but I could not be happier.

On the writing front, besides my odd rattles on this old site here and there… I have finished my novel and am still in the process of editing it to what I would call ‘polished perfection’. I hope and pray that Penguin enjoys it when I finally work up the courage to send it. There’s no denying that them turning it down would crush me to the ends of the earth, but writing and becoming an author is my dream. So if it so happens (touch wood that it does not) that they turn me down, all I can do is brush myself off and try again. I will spend the rest of my life attempting to get my book published and one fateful day, my dream will come true. I can feel it.

This weekend, I am fending without my man as he has gone to a Bachelor’s somewhere in Stillbaai. Bachelor’s… usually I’d be pretty nervous about that, having had the worst set of boyfriends a girl could ask for in the past. None of which I think were faithful to me, but I have complete and utter faith in Shaun. I know he’s cheated in the past, we have told each other everything about each other… I think that is why we work. We know everything about each other, the good and the bad and we still accept each other. So yes, he has cheated before… but I can’t describe the feeling of security I feel with him. He has hurt me with words in the past, but he would never hurt me with another girl. You know when you just know? We are bigger than that.

So this weekend I am having a girls weekend. I have discovered the most beautiful dress that I will be trying on in the morning, a dress I hope to be wearing to my 21^st bash in six months’ time. I know it’s a bit early to start planning that sort of thing, but I can’t help it. I have always been a planner and I always will be. I always say I’d love to be one of those easy going, go-with-the-flow type of people, but reality is that it is not who I am.

“I am me, so let me be.” - Unknown